Thursday Thoughts

Do They Come in Different Colors?
Here is a conversation I overheard at Walmart last week:

Customer: I’m looking for a squeegee. Do you carry them?
Clerk: Yes we do. Do you want a big one or a small one?
Customer: I would like a big one.
Clerk: We only carry one size.

Wait, what?

The Skies’ the Limit
I recently got a $100 gift card for Amazon from my nephew and niece as their way of thanking me for something I crocheted for them. It was such a nice gesture because they had already paid me for the item as well. Scoooooooooooooooooore! Anyway, a $100 GIFT CARD FROM AMAZON. I am practically at a standstill because I simply don’t know how to spend my hundred bucks at Amazon. It’s not that I can’t come up with an idea. It’s Amazon; there is practically no end to what I can buy – or at least a hundred bucks worth of just about anything. I believe they outlawed the sale of body parts, but I don’t care because thus far my kidneys work fine. I’m trying to think of things that I have wanted but have told myself I couldn’t justify the purchase. I’m considering a new Wustof 8-inch chef’s knife. What would you buy?

Would You Like Fries With That?
Bill and I grabbed a quick lunch at Arby’s yesterday as we were doing some shopping. Now, don’t get me wrong. I don’t expect Arby’s counter help to have graduated summa cum laude from Harvard. I do wish, however, that they had completed a basic math course and developed some simple customer service skills. Here was our order: One Arby’s Classic Meal, One BLT sandwich, one drink. It sounds simple, doesn’t it? I can’t begin to tell you how many times he had to ask us a question about our meal. He even needed to bring in help at one point. Bill was paying, so I went to sit down. After an unexpectedly long period of time, Bill came to the table with our order. As he sat down, he deadpanned, “I must say, he put the FUN in dysFUNctional.” Well said.

But It Keeps My Hair From Blowing
Every time I hear a flight attendant give the spiel about how our seat bottoms will serve as a life preserver in case of a water crash, I think of what Butch Cassidy said to the Sundance Kid in the movie when they are about to dive off a cliff into the river. Butch Cassidy says, “What’s the matter?” The Kid says, “I can’t swim.” Butch responds, “Are you crazy? The fall will probably kill you.” I’m pretty sure that my seat bottom isn’t going to save my life if the plane plummets into the Atlantic Ocean. But I also recall these lines when I put on my helmet prior to taking my scooter out for a ride. I can’t really envision a situation in which my scooter would fall over and I would hit my well-protected head. And I’m not sure my light-weight helmet will keep me protected in the case of a real emergency. Still, it’s better than nothing.

Casey’s at Bat
Addie called us somewhere in the neighborhood of 7 o’clock on Monday evening inviting us to come to her softball game. We were literally just sitting down to eat our dinner. Such a late dinnertime is unusual for us because I shoot for 6 o’clock or so, but life happened and we ran late. So we didn’t get to see her game. But Tuesday, when she came by to play with Kaiya, Mylee, and Cole, she told us that they won a really exciting game, in which she pitched a lot. And when she was up at bat, she had no strike-outs, a couple of runs and a couple of walks. Here she is getting ready for one of her pitches….


I’m happy that my grandkids enjoy baseball and softball. Now if I could just get my head around the game.