This past Thursday, I was given the go-ahead by my foot surgeon to put weight on my left foot. He ordered me to wear a walking boot. “If your foot is touching the ground, it MUST be in the walking boot,” he told me firmly. I will, of course, comply. And I have.

One piece of good news he gave me was that I could take a shower. Yes, my friends, I haven’t taken a shower since the morning of January 7, before my surgery. I was shocked at my pre-op appointment to learn of this restriction. He was non-negotiable about this rule, and I figured he was the one who has a Doctor of Podiatric Medicine (DPM) and I have a degree in journalism. According to him, there was too great a chance of getting moisture into the wound, which can then become infected. Thus, I became the queen of sponge baths. My family didn’t leave the room when I entered, so I think I kept my dirt at bay. The shower felt wonderful. It isn’t something I will do every day, however, the way I did prior to the surgery. Until the foot is completely healed, once or twice a week will be my limit. Putting weight on that foot sans the walking boot was so weirdly uncomfortable. I’m sure it will get easier.

The biggest change in my life in the past five weeks of semi-confinement was the number of Amazon packages that appeared at my door. Having little else to do but think of things I need, it became so very easy to pick up my iPad, hit the Amazon app, and order. Sometimes I would order two or three times a day.

One day I realized my right wrist hurt from arthritis. (Well, actually it hurt because I had to crochet nonstop the few weeks before my surgery to finish the blanket for Adelaide…..)

I had a wrist brace, but it took me an embarrassingly long time to figure out that it was for my left hand and not my right. It was 9 o’clock in the morning on a Sunday. I went on my Amazon app and quickly found a wrist brace that would work on my right hand. I put it in my shopping cart, pressed purchase, and sat back and waited. Two hours later, our doorbell rang and my brace was at my doorstep.

Who doesn’t love Amazon?

Then I got my Visa bill, and it was exceptionally high. I perused the purchases and realized just how many times I had ordered from Amazon. I didn’t figure out the total, because ignorance is bliss. I’m not an idiot, however, and perhaps my decision to buy a blender wand (for example) was not a good one. I’ve lived many years without blending my soups, using a potato masher, and there is not a good reason why that couldn’t have continued.

“I’M DONE ORDERING FROM AMAZON,” I told Bill.

I think that lasted a day. I couldn’t live without a special nail clipper and a really cute pair of yoga pants. Because I’m going to do a lot of yoga some day.

I’m pretty sure I’m part of the reason Jeff Bezos could go into outer space. And it occurs to me that perhaps my right-handed carpal tunnel is due to Amazon buying instead of crocheting. Just sayin’.